October 18, 2010
Find unique and creative romantic gift ideas to make romance simple.
Welcome to the First Issue!
Like exercise, sports or losing weight, romance needs to be practiced consistently in order to form a loving habit and see positive results. Can you tell if your loved one is hungry for love? The growling hunger from the heart can be heard in the form of conflict, disrespect, distance, silence, arguments, hurt feelings, indifference, hardness, and loneliness.
Remember when you were pursuing your true love? You were active and consistent with romance, probably without even trying. As love grows, it can easily grow apart. Achieving any worthwhile goal requires your time, desire, action, sacrifice, patience and consistency.
Here are 5 steps to help you develop romance consistency.
1- Know Your Beloved
In order to do things that communicate love to your beloved, you must know what really means the most to her/him. Everyone and every relationship is different. If you don’t already know what speaks love to your partner, set aside some uninterrupted time together in a comfortable place to talk. (AAagh! Not talking - yes talking)
Ask questions like-”What really makes you feel loved?” Listen for the answers and write them down at a later time so they are not forgotten. This is very important for the rest of the steps to work. You do not want to bring flowers when she would rather receive a card with your loving words; both of you will be frustrated. In his book, The Five Love Languages, Dr. Gary Chapman identified five different love languages: Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Receiving Gifts, Acts of Service, and Physical Touch. Learn to speak in your sweetheart’s love language.
2- The Little Things
Realize that a little morsel every now and then is all that is needed to feed the hungry heart. Buy a mini sticky note pad and write little “I love you” to place on a mirror or on a steering wheel, in a lunch - etc. A consistent reminder of your love is reassurance that s/he is still the love of your life. Add to the meaningful little things that feed the hunger from what you learned in step 1. Write a short love letter. Find other creative romantic crafts, gifts and ideas at RomantiCraft.com
Romance is not about spending money you don’t have, but giving from the heart and sharing the love that you do have. Thoughtfulness requires thought.
3- Build Momentum
Busyness is an attack on romance consistency and your relationship. It’s very easy to forget or let a romantic moment slide, thinking all will be okay. It won’t. Don’t sacrifice your love or sharing of your love. Feeling loved is a deep and constant need.
Make your relationship the priority, and your loved one will notice. Take a small break from your work and write a quick loving text, email an e-card, or make a simple phone call. Change up the same boring week with a spontaneous surprise in your otherwise routine schedule. Turn off the TV once in a while and focus on your loved one.
Set a calendar online, on the wall or phone—anything to call you to frequent action. Use the reminder tools until romance and doing “the little things” becomes a habit.
4- Be Flexible
Things often go wrong or not according to plan due to rain or whatever. Have a Plan B just in case. Make an entire list of restaurant choices so that when the need or opportunity comes up, you can have an immediate or spontaneous date idea. Place a list in your car’s glove compartment or on your smart phone if you need to remember. The mood can change very quickly depending on certain circumstances. Keep a list of romantic ideas or dates so that if one doesn’t work for whatever reason, all is not lost. Just move on to the next idea and s/he’ll never know the difference.
5- Practice, Practice
Great players of any sport practice to perform at their very best. Do the same. Keep honing your romance skills to build a loving habit over four consecutive weeks. Continue to search for romantic ideas that you know will bring a smile until being romantic becomes a part of you and your everyday thinking. Ask yourself how you can show your love in a new, unique, and creative way on a daily or weekly basis.
If you look at romance consistency from the perspective of planting a rose bush for your loved one, you would first, know where to dig; second, plant the seed; third, cover with good soil; fourth, remove any weeds; and fifth, keep watering to grow. It would not be long before you see a beautiful rose blossoming.
Repeat these steps to bring joy and a full heart to your beloved. Your reward is how that fulfilled love is eagerly given back to you in various forms. After developing romance consistency, you’ll find your relationship growing closer, deeper, and stronger.
- By Paul Ferrulli
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